HE

Yesterday was his 85th birthday. The first birthday in 57 years that my grandmother has had to celebrate without him. I know he is always with her though. Thats where she draws her strenght. He was always the quiet one... now, he is just being especially quiet now.



There have been deaths in our family. I have lost grandparents and great grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins. Our family has always stayed strong. We are still strong, but right in the middle of our tight knittedness is a BIG GAPING HOLE that no one can seem to fill.

Kynastons, how did you do it? My mind has been drawn to each and every one of you when I start feeling sorry for myself.

The last thing in the world he would want us to do is to feel this way. One thing constant on my mind is I want him to be proud. I want to live my life in a way that he will be proud of me. It didn't take much for him to be proud of us as his kids, but that was biased of course. But now, more than anything, before I make a decision.... before I do something... I stop myself and think... and wonder...

Is he proud of me?

Much in the way we all need to think about our Heavenly Father... and our Savior, being proud of our decisions. Before we take that step, before we make that decision, do we stop and think...



Is He proud of me?